My Story

When I started this blog my intent was to stop Vincent Beggs, my ex boyfriend of 5.5 years, to leave me alone.  I thought if I could expose the games he plays underneath the facade, I would be able to heal in peace. That’s not how it worked out because the more I exposed him the more he lied and the higher the anti went.

My plan is to stop trying to prove he’s a monster because I know he’s a monster, and I know truth will eventually prevail and therefore what I want to do is focus on bringing awareness to how society treats victims of domestic abuse by way of sharing my experience.  From his friends, my friends to the justice system to his lawyers, and anyone in between, I will share how each represent a portion of society that victimizes the survivors of abuse all over again.  I am hoping that others will be encouraged to share their story without fear, because that is the only way we are going to be able to bring about change. That’s the plan, but I still find myself purging due to the physical damages I have to live with because of his actions.

Vincent Beggs violently assaulted me on December 21, 2016.  He was arrested for assault and pleaded the case to destruction of property because I was a mess emotionally. I was traumatized and was unable to gather emails and other evidence to the CommonWealth Attorney’s office to prove his guilt.  Plus, he got to me when he broke the no contact order and showed up at a coffee shop near my doctor’s office with flowers and managed to fool me into believing he cared.  As a result of his plea agreement he was placed on probation for one year and had to take anger management courses, which in my opinion did nothing for him beside empower him to be more emotionally abusive.

There was a no contact order in place from January 10, 2017 – It was supposed to be permanent, but he managed to talk me into having it removed from his plea agreement by dangling the fact that he was going to be paying for my medical bills.  The wall next to the door is where he threw me and where I hit my head so hard that it destroyed my inner ear. The email is to a designer buying me jewelry for my birthday.  Card is for my birthday he gave to me over dinner at the Majestic in Alexandria, VA .  The pic of his back was taken February 4 when we spent the night together and the email is from December 4, 2017 of him trying to explain he’s not tracking me. The screenshots of his web site is just that…Oh yes, not only did I he make me a blog but a spotify playlist.  He fooled me over and over and over and over again!

 

This is how he talks to me when no one is watching. This is Not Normal Behavior and it scares me.

https://www.tapeacall.com/kwr9hc2cwu

As part of his plea he was suppose to have no contact with me, but used paying for my medical bills which are enormous and talked me into asking the CA to remove the provision.

As a result of the assault  I have cognitive deficits which I may never recover from,  PTSD and permanent damage to my inner ear that have robbed me from living a healthy and normal life.  Knowing we were going to be litigating for damages he continues to try and play with my heart and mind.  He created a blog. He created Spotify playlists after he filed a bogus complaint with the magistrate making false accusations. He showed up at a restaurant I go to and talked to my friend for hours telling him about his travel plans to Vegas.  And when none of that worked he has turned to using the court system to try and gain the upper hand – He has painted me as a jilted lover and people believe him because that’s how good of a con he is.  Nobody wants to believe this monster threw me so hard that it destroyed my inner ear that I am still in therapy for – I have been told I may never be able to drive or ride a bike.  How do I stop feeling disgusted with the man that has caused so much pain in my life.

He scares me – He simply scares me because he comes across as such a nice guy, but if you pay attention to what he says you will notice none of the stories are consistent.

If you think it couldn’t get any worse, read the message below sent by an anonymous individual who used my deceased grandmother’s name for the first name, and the name of a Persian restaurant in San Francisco as the last name.  Vince had knowledge from the start who this person was and it appears as though they had been in contact since a lot of what is said is an exact replica of what I heard for many years.  Keep in mind my health issues and the fact that I still have PTSD – That’s how cruel he is – This isn’t about my letting go and moving on, it’s about my no longer being his enabler.

 

And just when you didn’t think it could get any worse….On May 4, 2018 Angela Plemmons Ramos, a 50 year old Barbara Morgan Stem Academy Teacher in Meridian, Idaho sent the message below via wordpress around 2 am.  

Sholeh Maykadeh commented on My gut tells me ante will go up

Vesta,
Why are you doing all of this? You are wasting your time and energy on negativity and vindictiveness. Negativity negatively rewires the brain. This is time and energy that would be better spent channeling it into positives, such as making memories for and spending quality time with &&&&&&, and Dave. Furthermore, don’t you think it would feel really good to look in the mirror and know that the person who you see looking back at you is telling the truth not only to others, but also being honest with herself, rather than fabricating false scenarios and repeating nearly thirty year old patterns and habits?  I can’t imagine that the outcome will be in your favor. In fact, I’m quite surprised that you don’t already have a defamation and libel suit against you for your continuous posts, each of which equates to a separate charge. Do you think that that anyone is going to believe your bogus claims that Vince did vestibular damage, when everyone knows that it it is linked to &&&&, as well as @@@@@ Who do you think you are fooling?  At some point we all have to be honest with ourselves and own the wrongs that we have done in order to truly heal. When will your time be? I am asking you to please remove any and all wrongful posts and to do the right thing. You don’t see any of Vince’s associates partaking in public shaming. They certainly could, and you would deserve it. However, they choose the high road. I would suggest that you choose to do the same. May God give you the strength to release the bitterness, redirect, and endure your broken heart as it mends.

She’s pathetic, isn’t she. Vince and Christine both knew about this and they chose not to reveal her identity. Instead they used what I said to her, assuming it was one of them because who in their right mind would do this, in court as a way to harass me.  Anyway…

While I a unsure about my long term goals as I am still purging all of his lies since he has no shame and continues to pour salt over my wounds, and going against the fear I feel from him is what I need to do to survive and gain back my self respect and dignity that he stole. I need to do exactly what he doesn’t want me to in order to remind myself I am almost free from his grip. I am far from perfect, but please don’t assume I am here because I am a scorned lover or still in love with this monster.  Please don’t belittle me and my self worth because I am far more worthy than to want to still be with a man who has caused brain injury, permanent damage to my inner ear, and has hurt my children by taking their sense of security.

This monster has caused chaos in my life so don’t belittle it by simplifying it to justify the discomfort you may feel, specially if you are his “friend.”   Why is my talking openly about what he did a sign of vindictiveness? Why does society automatically assume the victim has ulterior motive, deserved the abuse or is unstable? Of course I am a little unstable, my brain has been damaged.  My sense of security has been shaken. I live in constant fear so my being emotional and angry is normal.  Going on about your life, posting pictures of yourself, pretending you have done nothing wrong, lying about what happened to people you have surrounded yourself with is what is not normal.

I’m here to feel safe, to gain my sanity back and to make sure that somehow I contribute to a positive change so people like him feel ashamed for doing what they did versus victims like me.  I am tired of people expecting me to not talk about the abuse.  I am here because victims, including myself are abused a second time around by society and it needs to stop, and the only way it will is if we stop being ashamed and openly talk about what we went through and include all the ugly details.  I’m tired of Vince telling his version of the story, defaming me while he privately does things to continue re-traumatizing me.  His enablers believe him because on the outside he’s a lamb, but they don’t live my life and they will never see the monster I was with because he is that good.  He needs his enablers to believe the lies he’s telling himself.

So, the next time you see him, tell him you are riding with him or having dinner with him knowing he assaulted me and has continued to do horrible things since.  Own it.  Don’t pretend.  Don’t not mention it because it’s none of your business.  That’s why women stay in abusive relationships that sometimes gets them killed.  You have a responsibility to stop the abuse.

I’m reaching out to every other woman who has been through this in hope that together we can bring upon change. Email me!

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