Gaslighting, Healing Stages, My Story

Dear future or current supplier, according to the ever changing story, Brain trauma and destroying my inner ear is the way Mr. VP broke up with me on December 21, 2016.  

“A little less than 5 years” was the lie he told when he said he broke up with me on the 21st of December, 2016.  I guess he considers causing brain trauma and destroying someone’s ear the way to break up.  Or he could have been screwing around before he assaulted me or after and was telling whoever, he was single.  It would explain shaving his pubic hair and lying to say he did it for me when we hadn’t planned to see one another.  We were fighting during his business trip to Iowa, came back, we met at a coffee shop, made up, and ended up in bed.

It could be the story he was telling his friends and family.  Skipped telling them we went to Vegas in March.  He led me to believe we were going to Colorado in June.  I feel shame I stayed but I needed him to show true remorse and to be really sorry so I could justify staying after what he did.  I couldn’t rectify what has happened and how I could have been with someone so abusive.

Luckily, Every piece of evidence out there shows we were together until mid August when I told him I didn’t want to see him. There’s also proof there was contact until December 2017, not counting March 4, 2018.

Last time we had sex was August 4, 2017, but I was still in his clutches because he was paying for my  medical expenses.  I owe breaking from him to my psychologist and her team because with their help I realized keeping in touch him even when he was paying for my medical bills was retraumatizing since he was using it as a form of control. It wasn’t clean as it sounds.  The two of us have told each other officially to stop contacting the other multiple times.  On September 4th when we messaged through gmail and he was nice so I doubted myself – breaking free wasn’t easy.  He was toxic and getting him out of my system took a lot of time.  He didn’t make it easy with his blog or Spotify trying to send messages he cared.  He had done this to me when he was trying to pursue me to not go through filing charges.

Here are some texts and emails after the 21st.

I need to do this today because I feel sad.  I feel had, taken advantage of and used.  I need to do this to expose his lies.  There’s so much more.  He sent pics of his kids and he during their vacation in August. There are gifts…I feel sad because I don’t understand how someone can be so cruel.

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This was early June or July. Bastard threw my lipstick at me.  Lucky I found a text saying he was going to work on throwing things.  A liar can never ever remember their last lie.  Truth will always prevail.

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