I am making his “books” that he wrote to me every Christmas public because they are meaningless and because he has gone on living life without any remorse or afterthought after violently attacking me with such force that it caused a severe concussion, which I am still dealing with. If that wasn’t enough my head hit the wall so hard it caused vestibular trauma that will impact me the rest of my life. I wish he would just go away. I wish he would get off all social media where he shows off his atheletic abilities and his trips and posts selfies of himself with that fake smile. I am more sensitive because I received more disappointing medical news yesterday and that leads to triggering memories of why I have the health problems that I do. If I sound bitter, it’s because some days I am. Some days I am angry that he is the vermin that he is and that I didn’t have the strength to kick him out of my life when I knew I should have. I’m angry today that 13 months after his assault I still can not run. I can’t drive…The list is long… So while Mr. AssHole VP goes around posting selfies of himself and telling mutual friends I’m the unhealthy ones, I am bombarded by constantly having to be reminded of what he did to me. That’s just the physical abuse. The emotional abuse…5 years of gaslighting and lying and being made to feel disposable is going to take a long time to heal from.
I consider this major love bombing since he wrote it while he was in Chicago with his ex wife when he had told me he had told her he didn’t want her there given they were no longer together. HE LIED! When he came back he gave me this book, fucked me 7 or 8 times and told me how much he was in love with me. I was such an idiot for buying the lies. This is also for all the times he treated me as if I was disposable and invisible. This is so everyone can see the crap he was telling me while telling whoever I didn’t exist. I am certain he was dating someone last spring so next are going to be his texts saying he’s not seeing anyone. 5 years of BS. I’m not going to own the shame anymore. 2013-2015 coming soon along with maybe audio recordings of how he talked to me about attacking me. His love wasn’t real and he lied to everyone about what he did to me….because he Is devoid, detached, disconnected, a lying cruel human who has no empathy for anyone nor takes any responsibility for his actions.